I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
