HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
