ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
