Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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