We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
