i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
