from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
