Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Randomize
