I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Randomize
