wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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