Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
