I'm jealous of your bromance
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
