Kiss
Puke
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
