You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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