well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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