i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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