nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
