I don't think brook has ever known best
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
