Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He told me they were just razor bumps!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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