Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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