Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
