On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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