She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Randomize
