Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
