She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
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