hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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