come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
