Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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