He kissed a someone with a penis
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
