My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
