I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
