I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize