It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
