i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
