how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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