HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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