the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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