You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
