check it out our google latitudes are spooning
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
