Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
