You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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