I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
