That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
