would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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