I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
