they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
