there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'm determined to sit on that face.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
