You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
