If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
