yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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